We all have people in our lives that we want to love well. But sometimes it can be a challenge to figure out what would be meaningful to them. Do you feel like you struggle to find just the right thing that will make help people feel cared for and make their day? There is a secret to making them feel loved and uncovering it can change everything. It’s just a matter of knowing their love language.
Dr. Gary Chapman believes there are five ways people speak and receive emotional love: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch. Whether it is someone in your family, a neighbor, your best friend or someone you just met, discovering their love language can make all the difference!
Here are some tips to help you along the way:
Notice What Brings Them Life: A person’s reaction to simple gestures can be a good indication of how they feel loved.
Watch How They Love Others: We often love others the same way we want to be loved. Paying attention to how they express love to you and those close to them can be a valuable clue.
Listen to What They Hope For: Many times people will verbalize what they want. Sometimes this is in the form of a request, other times it can be a complaint. Listening to what they say will give you insight.
Simply Ask: Let me share a personal experience with you. I assumed that my son valued receiving gifts. He always lit up when you gave him a video game and he often talked about the different things he wanted. One day I asked him what he valued most. Come to find out, his love language is quality time. Looking back it makes perfect sense. He’d always said his most favorite thing about a birthday or holiday was spending time with family and he often recounts stories of our time together. This question may feel a bit direct, but it can lead to a rich conversation and will let the people in your life know how much you care.
As you care for one another do a bit of detective work to discover what love language the people around you speak. You’ll find that it can make a simple gesture deeply meaningful!
To learn more about the love languages check out the various books about The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Click HERE to see his work on Amazon or visit your favorite book distributor.